{"id":3310,"date":"2025-05-27T14:27:37","date_gmt":"2025-05-27T14:27:37","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/petrawildoer.nl\/?p=3310"},"modified":"2025-05-27T14:27:37","modified_gmt":"2025-05-27T14:27:37","slug":"perfection-breeds-disconnection","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/petrawildoer.nl\/en\/leadership\/perfection-breeds-disconnection\/petra\/","title":{"rendered":"Perfection breeds disconnection"},"content":{"rendered":"<article class=\"text-token-text-primary w-full\" dir=\"auto\" data-testid=\"conversation-turn-2\" data-scroll-anchor=\"true\">\n<div class=\"text-base my-auto mx-auto py-5 [--thread-content-margin:--spacing(4)] @[37rem]:[--thread-content-margin:--spacing(6)] @[72rem]:[--thread-content-margin:--spacing(16)] px-(--thread-content-margin)\">\n<div class=\"[--thread-content-max-width:32rem] @[34rem]:[--thread-content-max-width:40rem] @[64rem]:[--thread-content-max-width:48rem] mx-auto flex max-w-(--thread-content-max-width) flex-1 text-base gap-4 md:gap-5 lg:gap-6 group\/turn-messages focus-visible:outline-hidden\">\n<div class=\"group\/conversation-turn relative flex w-full min-w-0 flex-col agent-turn\">\n<div class=\"relative flex-col gap-1 md:gap-3\">\n<div class=\"flex max-w-full flex-col grow\">\n<div class=\"min-h-8 text-message relative flex w-full flex-col items-end gap-2 text-start break-words whitespace-normal [.text-message+&amp;]:mt-5\" dir=\"auto\" data-message-author-role=\"assistant\" data-message-id=\"be06b7ce-aafb-46b1-b8ac-f0a515a6b5b3\" data-message-model-slug=\"gpt-4o\">\n<div class=\"flex w-full flex-col gap-1 empty:hidden first:pt-[3px]\">\n<div class=\"markdown prose dark:prose-invert w-full break-words light\">\n<p data-start=\"37\" data-end=\"244\">There are those leaders who always seem to say the right thing. Who never sigh, never appear uncertain, always stay calm and composed. Everything is meticulously organized, flawlessly prepared, clear, and professional.<\/p>\n<p data-start=\"246\" data-end=\"275\">I don\u2019t trust them one bit.<\/p>\n<p data-start=\"277\" data-end=\"450\">It\u2019s too smooth. Too neat. Unrealistic, even. As if there\u2019s a curtain hiding where real life is happening, but as a colleague or team member, you\u2019re not allowed behind it.<\/p>\n<p data-start=\"452\" data-end=\"892\">Perfection breeds disconnection. Not because people are jealous of perfection, but because it creates distance. It&#8217;s difficult to relate to. And because it paralyzes people. \u201cIf you&#8217;re so perfect, I\u2019ll never be good enough.\u201d It\u2019s hard to feel connected to someone who never drops the ball. Whether it\u2019s a mistake, a moment of doubt, a bad joke, or an off-day, it&#8217;s precisely those little rough edges that make us like someone.<\/p>\n<p data-start=\"894\" data-end=\"1456\">Still, many leaders try to keep up that perfect image for as long as they can. The image of control, of a solid figurehead. From the outside, it might look like everything is running smoothly. But inside, it&#8217;s often a different story. An endless inner monologue: \u201cYou need to be sure before you speak.\u201d \u201cWhat if they see right through you?\u201d \u201cPeople expect you to have the full picture.\u201d \u201cYou can\u2019t afford to doubt.\u201d \u201cYou\u2019re the one who\u2019s supposed to know. You were given this role, so you need to live up to it.\u201d \u201cDon\u2019t give them a reason to question you.\u201d<\/p>\n<p data-start=\"1458\" data-end=\"1914\">It\u2019s the language of imposter syndrome. The quiet belief that you\u2019re just pretending and could be exposed at any moment. So what do you do? You mask all uncertainty with control. You perfect, you plan, you work far too much. And above all, you hide how much you\u2019re actually doubting. But in doing so, you only reinforce that one fear: that who you are isn\u2019t enough. And ironically, the harder you work to appear credible, the less authentic you become.<\/p>\n<p data-start=\"1916\" data-end=\"2251\">People instinctively sense when something is off. And so, slowly but surely, trust begins to erode. You start trying to prove yourself and end up losing connection. With yourself, because you&#8217;re constantly showing what you think is expected of you. And with those around you, because they no longer feel who you really are.<\/p>\n<p data-start=\"2253\" data-end=\"2554\">Perfection breeds disconnection.<br data-start=\"2285\" data-end=\"2288\" \/>Not because it\u2019s too good, but because it\u2019s not real. Credibility doesn\u2019t lie in being flawless, but in being authentic. In daring to say: \u201cI don\u2019t always know either.\u201d In showing where you&#8217;re human, instead of the leader you think you\u2019re supposed to be. And the moment you take the lead in being human, you invite others to do the same. Only then do you get a team where people truly dare to be seen. Where honesty is the norm. And where mistakes aren\u2019t covered up, but put to good use.<\/p>\n<p data-start=\"2798\" data-end=\"2994\" data-is-last-node=\"\" data-is-only-node=\"\">So maybe this is the invitation:<br data-start=\"2830\" data-end=\"2833\" \/>Let go of the pursuit of perfection, just a little. Not because you\u2019re not doing well, but because you\u2019re doing so well, there\u2019s room for a few loose threads.<\/p>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/article>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>There are those leaders who always seem to say the  [&#8230;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":3311,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[30],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-3310","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-leadership"],"acf":[],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v27.5 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/product\/yoast-seo-wordpress\/ -->\n<title>Perfection breeds disconnection - Petra Wildoer<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"A blog about how the pursuit of perfection can lead to disconnection.\" \/>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/petrawildoer.nl\/en\/leadership\/perfection-breeds-disconnection\/petra\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Perfection breeds disconnection - 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